arts

How's My Driving?

bikini espresso standA hundred years ago, horseless carriage owners would have found the idea of drive-in movies and restaurants fantastical.

They were everywhere by the early baby boomer years. Other drive-in venues followed: dry cleaners, banks, pharmacies, florists, even wedding chapels. These have proven to be more than mere fads.

I’m defining drive-in as drive-thru, which means you don’t have to leave the vehicle to get the goods or services.

Here are a few implausible ideas that already exist: 

Mortuaries. It began in Los Angeles, but is spreading. Especially convenient for celebrities who draw lots of gawkers devotees.

Bars. Not grocery stores where you buy bottled products to take home, but actual saloons that serve liquor to drink while you drive away. Impossible? Not in Los Angeles or Louisiana.

Lawyers are always on the cutting edge.

Churches are a natural for the drive-in experience. Here’s one in Daytona Beach.
There are also drive-thru churches for individual prayer and communion. Perfect for confession, but the Catholic Church is slow to embrace innovation.
Why stop here? Consider the pop culture possibilities. Many of these conveniences would cater to midlife and aging baby boomers.

Doctors. Services limited to simple procedures: taking blood pressure, flu shots, drawing blood, face tag removal.

Blood Banks.

Nail Salons. Manicures and repairs. Pedicures would require opening the door.

Nursing Home Visits: Connection between window of resident and car-full of relatives. For those busy days when formal visits are inconvenient.

Massage. Hand, neck, shoulders and feet in regular car. Complete body treatment in a van. Quickies or full sessions.

Hypnosis and tarot card reading.

Mental health therapy. Quickies or full sessions.

Inspiration/Joke: Fast stop for an uplifting quote or a regenerative laugh.

Hugging Station. Pay by the second.

Gambling. Why take a bus to Las Vegas for a senior gambling trip? A quick roll of the dice or a pull of a slot handle and you’re off. Bingo. drive-in churchOn-going chess games. Checkers.

Grocery Stores. On a small scale, they already prosper, especially in Southern Florida, but the idea could be greatly expanded.

Bird Watching.

Fishing.

Hunting. This is done on some African safaris.

School classes.

Speed Dating.

Symphonies/Concerts. Live performances, a great employment opportunity for enterprising artists. Quickies, paid by the minute, or full shows. Latter would be organized like drive-in movies.

Early Bird Cafeterias. Drive-thru service with pleasant tree-lined parking areas for consumption with optional large screen TV/Movies.

Midwives. Necessary to have a van. Rental services could provide the vehicle.

Brothels. These already exist everywhere, but aren’t institutionalized. Attention Las Vegas, where it’s legal.

Logistics for some of the above ideas are complicated. I leave the details to engineers and entrepreneurs.

Terry Hamburg writes the Baby Boomer Daily about the exciting and revolutionary baby boomer years.

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